What is the 25th reason you can’t find love?
The 25th reason you can’t find love is because you don’t understand the opposite sex. We are told so many lies about the opposite sex when we are children. We are told that girls are innocent and made of sugar, spices and all things good. Boys are made of puppy tails and dirt. Then they grow up and get to know each other without knowing how to interact. Both men and women end up using a one size fits all approach.
On the one hand, I have lived in several countries with English speakers and non-English speakers. What I saw were human beings. Healthy women had wombs and could have a baby. Men had sexual organs to impregnate women. While living in those places, I noticed that the men were stronger than the women, they all ate, slept, went to the bathroom and drank fluids. At some point, everyone got angry, sad, happy, frustrated, etc. And all healthy humans go through the experience of learning to walk, talk, eat, receive education and use it in our daily lives.
I say all this to say that there are many generalizations that all healthy humans share. Both men and women are human and share many common experiences.
However, in the US, many women view men as watchdogs and ATM machines. They have a more diplomatic way of saying it. They say a man’s role is to provide and protect. You don’t have to be human to do that. That’s where women miss out on the true value that men can bring.
Women are taught that men are simple, want one thing and think with smaller heads. They are told that women are smarter and more mature than men. However, all the civilizations and industries of the world have been created by men. How smart do you have to be to start from scratch and go from planning, financing, educating and employing people to building cities, towns, commerce and entertainment? Everything is done to make women’s lives safer and easier. Except the women pretend like the men haven’t done anything. All this points to the fact that women do not understand men.
At the same time, the men face a rude awakening when they learn that the women are not innocent. They have equally desirable thoughts about sex as men. Society tells him to hide it. They also find that women cheat. It’s not just the men. In fact, the difference between cheating wives is not much smaller than that between cheating husbands. As a result, many men go from believing all women are innocent to women being gold diggers in a nanosecond. This disillusionment makes communication between the sexes very difficult. It doesn’t help when women are told that there is a battle of the sexes and that they must compete against men.
Women are not taught how to communicate with men. Men are expected to “just know” what a woman wants. That makes a lot of men take a look and say “yes, dear.”
Perhaps one of the biggest differences in the way men and women are raised is that children are taught clear consequences for any behavior. The girls are not. When they grow up, it becomes apparent. You see that when you ask men what they are responsible for in relationships. As a general rule, men can respond with a long list. When women are asked the same question, they talk about home and children. None of that is directly for the man. At most, the woman will talk about food and sex is what she provides to the man. Those things are mutual. Outside of that, she is not aware of what a man needs. The problem is that there are no consequences for her. At best, her man cheats. She stays because she can hold that over her head.
Ultimately, people are not taught to treat themselves as human beings. Each of us is individually responsible for making the relationship work. In the 21st century, making a relationship work means that the man is responsible. If you doubt me, listen to the slogan, happy wife happy life. It is the man’s responsibility to make his wife happy. That is if he himself wants to be happy.
As you can see, this is only the result of education. We improperly educate boys and girls about the opposite sex. If we prepare them properly, it will be easier for men and women to come together.
